Today was a rough day as a wife. I began the day by having a hormonal attitude with my husband, and then feeling guilty about it only an hour later. I apologized, and my husband is oh so forgiving. He rarely, if ever, reminds me of all the times I have been less than respectful and loving towards him. Not a great way to start the day.
Today was also a rough day as a mom and teacher. L has been extremely whiny lately, and it has been wearing me down. He is getting a tooth, so he has good reason to be uncomfortable, and he can't verbalize what he is feeling in words, so he whines. I understand it, but I don't like it. He's also at the age where he gets upset and whines when he doesn't get what he wants. It's been difficult to instruct him in the correct way to handle these upsets, when he is whining about pain too. As a result of this, we didn't get all of our school work finished today. I have learned that I need to give myself a little wiggle room right now, because we are still adjusting to having a new baby, along with beginning Kindergarten.
H has been very fussy the last day or so as well. He has wanted to eat more often than I have scheduled for. I realize he needs to eat to grow, and I feed him when he needs to eat, but feeding him every 2 hours has been hard for this very scheduled momma. The Lord is teaching me to cherish my children, as I so often forget to do.
I've also been struggling with resentment. I'm resentful of others ability to look so slim and well put together. I'm resentful that I didn't have lots of help after having baby number 4 (as a side, my husband was a HUGE help). I'm resentful that we don't have the money to make life a little more "comfortable". I'm resentful that I'm dealing with postpartum depression issues. I'm just very resentful right now.
As I was praying about this resentment, the Lord brought to mind that I am to be content in my situation. So, I am working on getting rid of my resentment, and living in contentment. Very difficult, but oh so worth it.
Wednesday, October 2, 2013
Tuesday, October 1, 2013
Where to start...
Today marks the beginning of a new adventure for me. This blog. I've tried to start two other blogs before, and I failed to continue to post. This is going to be my outlet after long days of being a wife, mom, and teacher (homeschooling mom). I've realized that in order to keep my sanity and not have a breakdown, I need to talk about my day. I figured this is as good a place as any.
I have always struggled with writing a back story, or playing catch up when I feel I've gotten behind. I given myself permission to not feel behind this time. I will just post what I need to "confess" the day I write. I will start with a short back story, but this is the only time I will feel the need to "play catch up".
Almost six weeks ago I gave birth to our fourth child. I expected the transition to be a hard one, after all I struggled immensely at the transition after child number three. Much to my surprise, it was a pretty natural transition. I began Kindergarten with M the day after I came home from the hospital, and we have been doing relatively well ever since.
Today, I had my postpartum check up. Everything looks good and I've been given the green light to resume regular activity. All you moms know what that means to hubby. Ha! I also talked with my OBGYN about non hormonal birth control. Without getting into too much detail, I didn't get the answer I was hoping for. That didn't help my emotional state at the moment.
I've been dealing with postpartum depression symptoms for the last couple of weeks, and I've been trying to suppress talking about it much, or really dealing with my feelings. This is the top reason I decided to start this blog; I need to talk about it somewhere. So, thanks for listening.
I have always struggled with writing a back story, or playing catch up when I feel I've gotten behind. I given myself permission to not feel behind this time. I will just post what I need to "confess" the day I write. I will start with a short back story, but this is the only time I will feel the need to "play catch up".
Almost six weeks ago I gave birth to our fourth child. I expected the transition to be a hard one, after all I struggled immensely at the transition after child number three. Much to my surprise, it was a pretty natural transition. I began Kindergarten with M the day after I came home from the hospital, and we have been doing relatively well ever since.
Today, I had my postpartum check up. Everything looks good and I've been given the green light to resume regular activity. All you moms know what that means to hubby. Ha! I also talked with my OBGYN about non hormonal birth control. Without getting into too much detail, I didn't get the answer I was hoping for. That didn't help my emotional state at the moment.
I've been dealing with postpartum depression symptoms for the last couple of weeks, and I've been trying to suppress talking about it much, or really dealing with my feelings. This is the top reason I decided to start this blog; I need to talk about it somewhere. So, thanks for listening.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)