Resentment is not Contentment

Today was a rough day as a wife.  I began the day by having a hormonal attitude with my husband, and then feeling guilty about it only an hour later.  I apologized, and my husband is oh so forgiving.  He rarely, if ever, reminds me of all the times I have been less than respectful and loving towards him.  Not a great way to start the day.

Today was also a rough day as a mom and teacher.  L has been extremely whiny lately, and it has been wearing me down.  He is getting a tooth, so he has good reason to be uncomfortable, and he can't verbalize what he is feeling in words, so he whines.  I understand it, but I don't like it.  He's also at the age where he gets upset and whines when he doesn't get what he wants.  It's been difficult to instruct him in the correct way to handle these upsets, when he is whining about pain too.  As a result of this, we didn't get all of our school work finished today.  I have learned that I need to give myself a little wiggle room right now, because we are still adjusting to having a new baby, along with beginning Kindergarten.

H has been very fussy the last day or so as well.  He has wanted to eat more often than I have scheduled for.  I realize he needs to eat to grow, and I feed him when he needs to eat, but feeding him every 2 hours has been hard for this very scheduled momma.  The Lord is teaching me to cherish my children, as I so often forget to do.

I've also been struggling with resentment.  I'm resentful of others ability to look so slim and well put together.  I'm resentful that I didn't have lots of help after having baby number 4 (as a side, my husband was a HUGE help).  I'm resentful that we don't have the money to make life a little more "comfortable".  I'm resentful that I'm dealing with postpartum depression issues.  I'm just very resentful right now.

As I was praying about this resentment, the Lord brought to mind that I am to be content in my situation.  So, I am working on getting rid of my resentment, and living in contentment.  Very difficult, but oh so worth it.